Hello my lovely Bloggy friends,
This post is just me putting my imagination and emotions to rest. I know this may seem silly and even be a little confusing for some people to understand. But to me it’s a way of life. I know if I don’t write this out or share my feelings I will not be able to get on with my day. Or do what I need to do. It will just loop in my head and I will feel bad.
I love my dogs and they love me.
Each month I go to the charity shop and buy both Zazzy and ROCK a nice new blanket. ROCk is a good boy and he loves his blankie. But Zazzy scratches at them and chews, sometimes ripping them to pieces. She’s not being naughty, Zazzy was abused as a puppy and when we went to get her we had to wait because those who had hurt her had stapled her mouth together. She had to have an operation and we wasn’t able to bring her home until the dogs home knew she was going to be ok. I think the chewing and ripping of blankets is part of her coping strategy, it’s something she has always done. It’s something I just accept about her, the blankets are only £1 each anyway.
Mr Locoman is on flex leave for two weeks
He very kindly went into our local town centre and picked up a couple of new blankets because he knew I wanted to do some painting. He left them in the kitchen for me last night and this morning I opened up the bag to find two wonderful, soft, thick, lovely blankets.
I took the one out and opened it up and it is covered in someones childhood achievements. It has over seventy badges very lovingly hand sewn onto it. The badges are from boy scouts, swimming, football, gymnastics etc, also visits to wonderful places of interest.
This blanket was once a little boys snuggle
It has been lovingly kept for all these years, the badges are mainly from the 70’s and early 80’s so I know the little boy would be a man about my age now, if he is alive.
Then my mind visualised just who he was, who sewed on the badges? Was it his Mom? What happened? Why has this been kept so long and now it is in a charity shop and about to be my dogs blanket that will probably get ripped up. I have a whole film in my head of this and I can’t seem to stop the visual replay. I actually feel quite emotional about it all.
They say that we don’t understand empathy
Today I feel sad for someone I don’t even know. This blanket was very special to a little boy and kept because it has all his wonderful memories on it. He may have struggled to do these things.
I still believe that Aspies switch off empathy because we hurt for everyone and everything. Or we don’t see the signs and this makes us look like we don’t care, later feeling terrible because we miss things that are important. Or is this just me, I don’t really know?
I do know though that by sharing this and giving it to God I don’t have to hold on to someone else’s memories on a blanket. I can pray for whomever he was and give thanks for his life and the life of the person who loved him enough to treasure his memories on a blankie for all these years.
Love and hugs.
Lisa. xx 🙂