There once was an ugly duckling.

Hello my lovely bloggy friends,

It’s always the same whenever I say I need a break, I go off to do all my things. Then suddenly get inspired and find I have to write. Writing helps me SO VERY much, it gets it out and helps me to process.

I’m writing this post to remind myself.

Back to the basics Lisa.

I write for me, I don’t write for anyone else. I write because it’s who I am and I have so much inside me that I want to share. It helps me to feel connected and I know that it helps others too. I like to feel that I am helping in some small way.

I should only write when I feel inspired to write, not because I’m getting messages and emails. I’m happy if people enjoy what I write, but I’m only human. I can’t always put words together, I struggle to answer my comments sometimes. I have to wait till God inspires me and then it’s not hard for me to do. I don’t want what I love doing to become yet another chore.

I’m just being me and that’s all I have.

I feel hurt when I feel judged, because what I do here on my blogs I do freely and with love. I can’t be expected to make others happy, only God can do that. Each person is responsible for finding their own happiness. I’m sorry if who I am or what I write offends anyone, people only need to read my posts if they want to.

Everyday I have the choice, I can get up and sing with the birds.

I have the choice to look for all that is positive in my life.

I haven’t gone to church this morning, Mr Locoman brought me a Coffee in bed and I sat and read my new book.

I feel a peace within my head today, going into the Jumble of Church would be wonderful for some, but for me today I know it will start my loops up. I know I won’t process everything going on, I have only just found myself. I am enjoying having only a few thoughts right now, so I’ll just stay where God has got me for as long as I can.

I’m going to do what will help me

I can’t read books cover to cover, my brain switches off and my dyslexia then kicks in. I have to read what helps me, what connects me. In the book I’m reading at the moment, the chapter I’m studying, alongside the Bible is titled,

“Relationships that will make your heart sing, proverbs on people skills.”

It is only 14 pages long. I know most people can read this amount in minutes, but I feel I need to inwardly digest these pages along with everything I feel guided to read with it. What really spoke to me this morning is the following lines.

Whom do you know who might look at you and say, “You are a mirror in my life, and when I look at you it inspires me and lifts me up and makes me want to do better?” Who would write down your name?

This made me really think long and hard. Thank God we are forgiven and Jesus paid our ransom.

While I was showering this morning

I was reminded of a song, I had a film visual rerun with full sensory emotional stuff actually…hehe.

I remembered the most wonderful memory. Just me and my Mommy snuggled up on the sofa watching the film Hans Christian Andersen. I also had the wonderful experience of hearing and seeing my beautiful Mom fluttering around the living room pretending to be a swan getting me to copy her and sing the song, “There once was an Ugly Duckling.” This part of Aspergers can be so helpful.

My Mom knew me so well, she knew I would hide just like the ugly duckling. God totally blessed me with the most wonderful mirror.

I feel this ugly duckling has been through too many winters in hiding, it’s time to take flight.

“I can do all things through Him who gives me strength!”

Love and hugs.

Lisa. xx πŸ™‚


17 thoughts on “There once was an ugly duckling.

  1. Lisa, your thought about spending too many winters in hiding and it being time to take flight brought tears to my eyes, as it echoes my own recent thoughts. I’m glad you are feeling peaceful today, and I hope you find peace in your flight.

    • Hi thoughty autie,
      I think as Aspie/Auties we all spend to many winters in hiding in one way or another.
      It’s time for us all to see who we are created to be, time to take flight friend.
      Love and hugs.
      Lisa. xx πŸ™‚

  2. So glad you’re feeling better…you have so much to offer those who do not understand the human side of autism…continue to offer your gifts to those around you and those who just know you by what you write. Cheers!

    • Thanks slp, I’ll do just that!
      It nice to know that those who are reading are seeing my human side.
      I thought I’d got one somewhere, it’s been in hiding for quite sometime.
      Love and hugs.
      Lisa. xx πŸ™‚

  3. I am so glad you are doing well – I have had to remind myself to write for me many times – it is so easy to get caught up in everyone’s expectations of us and to take on things that aren’t ours.

    The book you are reading sounds wonderful, and I hope I am a mirror to someone. I have learned so much from you, but more importantly, I am glad to have met you and get to know you through this blog.

    • Awww, AM you made all emotional. You are just so lovely aren’t you!
      Of course you are a mirror, what you share is wonderful, you help so many of us.
      The links you shared in one of your posts helped me SO much.
      I would never have found them myself, God uses you my friend.
      I am glad to have met you too here in bloggyland, maybe one day we will meet for real.
      Keep being you my friend, you are amazing and don’t you forget it!
      Love and hugs.
      Lisa. xx πŸ™‚

  4. Pingback: Tip toe through the Tulips, watch out for the wolves. « Alienhippy's Blog

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    • Hello my lovely Fi, Philippians 4:13…hehehe
      I just had my devo come through on email and guess what???
      It’s Philippians 4. Isn’t God just so funny!
      Now me is thinking, how does that tie in with Gideon and sheep…LOL
      I love you so much. xxxx

  6. I love the Ugly Duckling.That would have been passed down by out Mother. I actually thought all Mothers were like that dancing around and role playing with their children, but I have since learnt that this is not the case. For a child to progress and grow, they need Mothers like we had. Our Mom would rather have left the housework and danced around or play acted with her children. We have been blessed in our Family with good Mothers, it has been passed down the line. “Oh go on….your a Swan” Love you xxxx

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