Listening through the Loops

Hello my lovely bloggy friend,

I woke up this morning with a head FULL of “Lightening jumps and connections.”

I must have been replaying in my sleep.

Leesy-Loo’s La-La Land is FULL of Loops, you know!….giggle.

My closest friend told me she only loops when she is stressed or anxious about something. It will be one repetitive loop. That’s the one that I call the “NOT KNOWING” It drives me mad and makes me want answers, because I know that if I don’t get answers this loop starts off the others. The worse one being the “FRANTIC THOUGHT” loop.

In this loop I’ll be looping on absolutely everything. I can become completely paranoid. This one gets me on my Knees….I can giggle about it now I see it, but I hate it when I’m there. Good thing is… God is showing me, so I’m quite excited about what I can see. Now I can start to understand.

The best way I can explain, is like this…

image from Google

Imagine an Orchestra.

When you listen to it playing a piece of classical music…it can start off with a very quiet sound that is continual.

Imagine that sound …a continual sound that you just can’t place.

Then a flute will jump in and maybe the string section for a while…Oh what’s that I hear? A French horn…that sounds pretty, now it’s gone again, and there’s that sound….what is that sound?

I can hear trumpets now, and a very quite drum, oh and that’s a triangle too…but what is that sound? I want to know?

Oooo a double bass, that sounds really good in the background and that drum has gotten a little louder, where’s that sound gone I can’t hear it?

I want to hear it! Why has it gone?

Oh there it is…I feel ok again now, but what is it? Why can’t I figure out what it is?

Can anyone tell me what that sound is? I don’t like not knowing!

**********************************************************************

Ok, get the picture…giggle, giggle.

If you haven’t got a clue what I’m talking about, then you don’t loop and probably think I’m a nutter.

The “NOT KNOWING” becomes the focus. But the other things are still looping, then the insecurity from the “NOT KNOWING” with our sensory the way it is, will cause this anxiety to cross over into what we are certain of.

This is the way God has helped me to understand it, because with my dyslexia, I can’t read books.

This image has really, REALLY helped me.

I think that when the “NOT KNOWING” is out of my control, it’s only stepping back, looking at it from outside, and KNOWING that God is in control that will slow down this loop for me.

In some cases it can be a shutdown.

For me as a Christian with Aspergers it is a case of surrendering to God BUT not the unkind ways of this world.

As it is my understanding of how people treat and perceive me that causes anxiety and stress.

The unkind ways of some people, added to my NOT KNOWING causes the loops, but God tells us that Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. This is what I am trying my best to hold on to. I know God will get me through the loops now, I’m not afraid of the loops anymore.

I also have a poem to share that I wrote called,

“I feel, I’m at a bit of a junction.”

You can read this poem over at my new blog, don’t forget to subscribe while you are there.

Here is the link…“Listening through the Loops”

I KNOW I’m very naughty…and WAY too cheeky.

But you KNOW you love me really. Don’t you??  *wink *wink..giggle

Love and hugs.

Lisa. xx 🙂

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17 thoughts on “Listening through the Loops

  1. Pingback: I feel, I’m at a bit of a junction « Listening through the Loops

  2. I find my loops make it rather difficult to come to a decision at times.
    The many loops are each telling me I should go in a different direction.
    And when I think I have settled on a plan, along comes a loop casting doubt on it.
    So I spend a lot of time spinning my wheels and going nowhere.

    I’m glad you are finding your way out of the loops trap.
    Just being aware of the trap is a big step forward for me and gives me hope, and the courage to reject the loop and press ahead anyway (sometimes).

    I’m glad you are sharing your observations, Lisa. It makes it easier for me to spot what is going on in my own head.

    • Hello Bruce,
      I find it’s always the still small voice at the end of the loops that’s the best one to listen to.
      It’s just waiting it out and trusting that it will come… this is the hardest thing to do.
      Waiting for those dots to connect and the picture to be made clear.
      Love and hugs my dear friend.
      Lisa. xx 🙂

  3. These loops cannot be nice at times, however you obviously have coping strategies in place now. It is whatever suites each individual. Though I cannot relate to the loops, I can relate to obsessive thinking which may be similar. I have my own coping strategies in place now to deal with this. Love you xxxx

    • Hello my lovely Fi,
      You know Fi, I first had this thought way back last year when we first met.
      One of your posts mentioned how *Harley didn’t enjoy classical music.
      I was very good in my music lessons at picking out which instrument was playing and when.
      But while listening for sounds, it is impossible for me to hear music.
      I have to feel music to enjoy it, this means switching off the loops.
      So, my lovely friend, you inspired this post.
      It just took a while to filter through and process.
      I love you and everything about you.
      Lees. xxxx 🙂

  4. Pingback: Oldies are the besties | Alienhippy's Blog

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