Hello my lovely bloggy friends
I’m going to share something today that is looping around in my head. I’m just going to babble in the hope of getting some understanding for myself.
In 1995 I became a single parent, my marriage broke down and I lost my home. I’ve shared about this before. So I’m not going to bore you.
When this finally went to court and I got my home back, it was not the home I remembered. EVERYTHING was wrecked. My cooker was disgusting, all the mattresses on every bed were filthy. My carpets were all stained and sticky. The drainage had broken and it had not been reported, which meant I had waste all over my patio and flowing into my shrubbery. To top it all my electric had been overloaded and two circuits had completely blown.
The tenants obviously lost their deposit,
It was only enough to fix the electrics. I was a single mom living on single parent benefits. Don’t get me wrong I had enough to survive, but there wasn’t enough to replace the damage that had been done to my home and furniture.
I was glad to have my own home again, I worked really hard getting everywhere clean. *AJ was only three and I hated that the house was not how I had made it for him. Before I had to move out, I was suffering badly with OCD. (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder a poem I wrote) My home was immaculate and I spent every minute of the day keeping it that way.
Being a single parent was hard work,
I had to become both Mom and Dad. Having to think and re-think how to raise a little boy on my own. I had to learn how to do all the DIY and Gardening, how to maintain my car. Plus do all the housework, cooking, cleaning. *AJ was a handful…giggle. He was so hyper ALL the time.
I got pretty good at the more practical side of things.
DIY was actually easier for me than I thought it would be. I built my own shed and rabbit hutches. I even relayed a new patio and path down my garden. Which is 180 feet long people. That’s quite some going for someone who is only 4’11”
Making things worked out so much cheaper than buying them, so that is what I did. My Aspie brain just craved the need to know how to fix, build and maintain every part of my home. When the toilet broke, I got a DIY book and learnt how to fix it. When asked what would you like for your Birthday Lisa? I replied I need new bits for my power drill. For Christmas I want a circular saw I’m building a new shed, it works out cheaper and stronger to build it in tongue and groove than buy a flat pack cheapo effort. You get the picture….I turned into Wendy from Bob the Builder.
I was a single parent for 5 years
Then I met Mr Locoman. I had absolutely NO intension of EVER remarrying but he won my heart. He just adored my little *AJ and my little *AJ adored him right back.
Mr Locoman is NOT very practical. So for the last 12 years we have had this bit of a role reversal going on. I have carried on with all the DIY, Gardening and minor car maintenance. Also doing some bits around the house when they have needed doing and they have screamed at me…giggle. Mr Locoman has took over with all the ironing and various other chores he has felt needed doing.
Since the building work was done
AND…now the builders have finished their bit, both of us have felt TOTALLY overwhelmed by the amount of work we have left to do. Our kitchen is workable but we have no fitted kitchen yet, and not enough money to pay to have it fitted anyway. Every room apart from *AJ’s bedroom has been affected. I mean walls have been knocked down, moved, re-arranged in every single room. We have 2 rooms that are finished and comfortable to sit in. *AJ’s bedroom and the conservatory.
I’m not good when I have too much to think about,
Mr Locoman also is not good when things are not organised. We have chatted at length about this over the last few days and feel we both need to have a change.
I have had to back away from my perfectionist view of decorating and let my lovely hubby give it a go. I have taken over with all the housework and chores and I have to keep telling him to stop doing them. He is such a hard worker, it would be so easy for me to be really lazy and do nothing. I won’t though, I’d feel really bad about doing that.
I must say he is doing a really good job
My little *CAL just loves helping me around the house. So I actually feel really content with this change, because I feel like I’m teaching my little girl how to become independent.
Anything is worth a try isn’t it???
I’ll keep you posted on how it goes.
Love and hugs everyone. xx 🙂
Here are a few photos of the re-build